Showing posts with label english. Show all posts
Showing posts with label english. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Rhytm of Losing

What if he is everything you don't know, every kind of impossibilites, will you still love him?
I think i'm going stop, but hug him instead. 
But it won't change a bit.
Yes, it won't. Then i'll hug him harder.
You just hurt him.
Why don't you ask why?
So, why?
Because i don't know. I don't know other option, thus I hug him with every his that I know and every kind of possible way to love him.
Still, it won't change.
Could it be still matter? Do you think it was unwishful for empty shell?
Yes, it isn't the case.
I'll try every physical and meta physical way to understand him, to let he understand himself.
You just making a fake prince of your unwishful thinking.
I'm being egoistical, but yes, so he does. Until my heart keep beat at the same rate, and those unwishful thinking he's actual wishes.
You're scary.
So you do.

Saturday, July 6, 2013

I am thinking about obsession

It just I was pretend to be strong. If I were built by words, what am I if you think every second and now it's fake, shit, and goddamn worthless. How worth gold is, if you happen seeking God's heaven?

And so, I'm thinking back and forth. I will try as far as my limit...


I'm trying to recall as many as possible I could, yet I found empty house and long echoes of those I couldn't remember.

And here we are...

...Time doesn't heal, it change us.

Friday, January 11, 2013

Don't fall in love with writer

I’ll tell you about it. Writers are like aliens. They string words of proportions to make people understand and see what their views yet behind all these, they have their own planets, they have their own language that even people of their own kind don’t get to fathom, at least most of the times. Writers are boring. They tend to look at the sky without particularly knowing why, or which part of the sky they’re staring at. They swoon over silver clouds while talking to a bunch of alter egos they always drag within them. 

Don’t fall in love with a writer. They love weaving magic carpets of words that will lift your poor soul far beyond the fray and cacophony of heartache and strife and will carry you to a realm of fantasies and dreams. Still, remember that words are words and fantasies are fantasies and that essays are just essays. 

Writers have the most deadly temper and the quickest switch-on switch-off mood. They are slaves to their emotion and can dramatize even a rusty leaking faucet. They justify everything in the name of their art. They read other people’s receipt and tend to eavesdrop at a couple having coffee nearby, not minding that you’re at his side, telling the most awesome tales of ants trailing the sidewalk. This, of course, is justifiable by saying “it’s research.” 

Also, writers give the cheapest of cheapest gifts. They’ll dote you with cards made of milk cartons with a written four-verse poem that doesn’t even rhyme. They’ll bring you flowers handed to them by admirers and would sometimes write “I love you” in your arms. Because state of poverty, to writers, are major avenues of their calling. They look at themselves as creatively complex and hard to understand in a Pablo Picaso cubism sort of way individuals since suffering is art. And because life in the media industry can be a cruel and a fickle beast, they can’t accept just any job. It has to serve their purpose. It has to contribute to a general public and must live to their philosophy yet, still, pinch a nerve near the heart. 

Even the most intimate details of your relationship could most of the times turn up in their writings. And although they are mightily concealed behind metaphors and allegories, you, of course, will still recognize them. It’s all about you after all. 

Although they never really intend to insult you, they will sheepishly remind you that “your” and “you’re” are different and that “despite” is the right one and “despite of” is the wrong one. I’m telling you, they’ll notice the smallest of details about you as an orgy of your descriptions are banging wildly inside their heads. Yes, even the color of your socks. 

Conversations with them are tough. They will talk about characters in books and art films as if they’re real, as if they’re someone tangible, someone he recently got a chance for a vis-à-vis over some tea and biscuits. Annoyingly, they have this habit of writing parts of your conversation on some dank piece of tissue paper. And like lawyers, everything you said is valid and can be used in favor or against you in future discussions. 

Probably the hardest one to understand is their addiction to solitude. It might not be close to that of Ernest Hemingway’s seclusion, but a time alone is always a must. It’s not a snob. It’s not barricading. But in solitude, not only he is gathering his thoughts, formulating sets of theories, but also re-arranging himself. 

But writers are one of the most romantic people you’ll ever meet. They’re lamentably passionate and will adore you for the most natural thing about you. For they don’t succumb to the societal dictates of beauty and form. You are an abstract masterpiece seen in a philosophical beautiful way. They are phenomenally too human that even their tears are sometimes trails of fluid words. They’re achingly martyrs and they can tell you in thousand ways how much you mean to them, how much they adore you and how much they love you. 

So don’t fall in love with a writer. Don’t fall in love with me.
gli
http://www.desoleboy.com/2011/11/dont-fall-in-love-with-writer.html

What happens if you fall in love with a writer?

Lots of things might happen. That’s the thing about writers. They’re unpredictable. They might bring you eggs in bed for breakfast, or they might all but ignore you for days. They might bring you eggs in bed at three in the morning. Or they might wake you up for sex at three in the morning. Or make love at four in the afternoon. They might not sleep at all. Or they might sleep right through the alarm and forget to get you up for work. Or call you home from work to kill a spider. Or refuse to speak to you after finding out you’ve never seen To Kill A Mockingbird. Or spend the last of the rent money on five kinds of soap. Or sell your textbooks for cash halfway through the semester. Or leave you love notes in your pockets. Or wash you pants with Post-It notes in the pockets so your laundry comes out covered in bits of wet paper. They might cry if the Post-It notes are unread all over your pants. It’s an unpredictable life.
But what happens if a writer falls in love with you?
This is a little more predictable. You will find your hemp necklace with the glass mushroom pendant around the neck of someone at a bus stop in a short story. Your favorite shoes will mysteriously disappear, and show up in a poem. The watch you always wear, the watch you own but never wear, the fact that you’ve never worn a watch: they suddenly belong to characters you’ve never known. And yet they’re you. They’re not you; they’re someone else entirely, but they toss their hair like you. They use the same colloquialisms as you. They scratch their nose when they lie like you. Sometimes they will be narrators; sometimes protagonists, sometimes villains. Sometimes they will be nobodies, an unimportant, static prop. This might amuse you at first. Or confuse you. You might be bewildered when books turn into mirrors. You might try to see yourself how your beloved writer sees you when you read a poem about someone who has your middle name or prose about someone who has never seen To Kill A Mockingbird. These poems and novels and short stories, they will scatter into the wind. You will wonder if you’re wandering through the pages of some story you’ve never even read. There’s no way to know. And no way to erase it. Even if you leave, a part of you will always be left behind. 
If a writer falls in love with you, you can never die. 

http://karenfelloutofbedagain.tumblr.com/post/14327141634/what-happens-if-you-fall-in-love-with-a-writer

Saturday, August 20, 2011

From A Particular Station

Right here is station. But only for one train. You may have travel far and far away. Your cells may fill up by hundred names. Yet, if one day, you've tired from running over the world, you may stay here. Stay longer even forever. I'll be your last place.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Captive

nowhere, but in the light.
we got a lot way to choose over.
that lead to moon or to sun.

a bum in wonder earth.
his head hanged to sky.
his hands linked to blazing-heat crater
his legs, was sinking down to the riverbed.
are you galaxy where i was born?.

it was right, to self-hatred.
instead adding salt to wounded heart
captive by worrying-clown man.

a bum in the wonder river.
look rainbow throughly at night.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

My Fear


my heart was pounding like burst out...

i scared tomorrow of tomorrow...

i can not wait until pain sprouted...

so, i prepare to go as black crow...



father, mother...to all system of life...

i have no name, no sister and no friend...

no emotion no passion for zombie...

and now, lemme go to very world of fiend...